The Cost

I have wanted to write about the financial cost of adoption for a while now because it's worth sharing for those wanting to know.  At the same time, I haven't wanted to because the truth is I find it awkward to share about the "cost" of my future child. 

When we were pregnant with Charlotte and Walker, we would share the exciting news, reveal the gender of the child, announce the arrival date and overload you with pictures once they arrived.  But no where along the way do we share the cost of the hospital bills.  No where along the process of sharing is there ever a dollar bill sign.  And with good insurance, there really wasn't much trouble paying it off.  I don't think many would label it as a "financial burden".

Burden.

A word no child should have to hear in association with themselves.  Future Brumley #3 will be one of the most amazing blessings into our family.  While this baby may arrive into our lives differently than the first two, in no way will they be anything less of a miracle.  And that's what I want them to grow up knowing.  So by sharing that our adoption will have a significant cost, could we be putting our child at the risk of somehow hearing that in the future and feel that they were a burden to us.  It brings this Momma to tears just thinking about it.

Cody and I have gone round and round trying to decide the best way to move forward.  We legally can adopt now.  We are receiving adoptive situations each week.  But at match and then again after the birth, there's a large amount of money that we need to have a plan to give.  Somewhere between $25,000-$40,000.

We've read books on the best ways to save.  We've stopped eating out.  Our goal is to feed the four of us on $100 a week.  We've significantly changed our spending budget.  We've sold tickets to Thunder games we bought last fall.  I've parted with Rustic Cuff bracelets that I previously bought.  Cody has sold pedals among other guitar parts.  We have a garage sale planned for the spring.  We've signed up for a interest free for a year credit card.  We are anxiously awaiting a hopefully good tax return.  We've applied to grants and adoption free loans.  So when do we take the next step? When do we say yes to being presented?  Do we wait until we have half the expected cost in savings?  Do we say yes now and trust that God will find a way to supply?

We've read books on how to "Adopt Without Debt".
We've read blogs on best ways to fundraise.
We've read blogs on why people chose not to fundraise.
We've read where people sell a car in order to finish an adoption...

Anyone want to give Cody a ride to church for the next year or so????

To be honest, I haven't written about this subject yet because it's overwhelmed me.  I don't know what the "right" thing to do is. Do we share and fundraise? Do we borrow and pay back?  And I'm looking at something that seems impossible to do.  To come up with a lot of money in a short amount of time.  We need a miracle.

You know what I love about God?  There is nothing that is new to Him.  Nothing surprises Him.  And nothing is too big for Him.

Matthew 14:13-21 shares the story of feeding the five thousand.  And that was just men.  With women and children, we know that number was even bigger!

"Now when it was evening, the disciples came to him and said, "This is a desolate place, and the day is now over; send the crowds away to go into the villages and buy food for themselves."

I know what a desolate place feels like.

"But Jesus said, "They need not go away; you give them something to eat."

Yes Jesus. Please.

"They said to him, "we have only five loaves here and two fish."

Jesus this is all I have.  I'll give you all we have.

"And he said, "Bring them here to me."

Here it is Jesus.

Not only did Jesus provide enough, He provided abundantly.

"And they all ate and were satisfied.  And they took up twelve baskets full of the broken pieces left over."

When Cody and I were talking last week, I shared that this passage came to mind again and again.  If we are being obedient to a calling on our lives, then I must have faith that God will do what only God can do.  And we are already seeing it.  He is multiplying our efforts.

Cody sold a guitar pedal and the young man paid him $5 extra.  "It's for the adoption.  Just do me a favor and name the kid after me."  Another pedal, $10 extra.  "Good luck in the adoption."

I sold a sewing machine and the family paid $20 extra.  "It's for your adoption.  It's not much."

I cried.  No, it was so much more than not much.

This weekend a family member handed us some money.  "This is the first of what we can give. "

And just like that, we realized God was multiplying our efforts just like he multiplied the fish and the loaves.

God this is all I have.  Thank you that you provide abundantly.

We will continue to take things one day at a time.  We have prayed about it and have decided to do a t-shirt fundraiser.  If you like t-shirts, then we would be honored for you to order one.  If it is odd to you that someone would have a fundraiser for something like adopting a child, then that's okay too.  I understand.   But please don't share it with us if you find disdain in our decision, because it's been a tough decision and if I know, I might cry. And that would just be awkward for all of us.

Please pray for us as we move forward.  Pray for our hearts.  Pray for our future baby.  Pray for the birth family of our future baby.  

And thank you for joining us for the journey.